He likes to complain about what he can control but doesn’t want to.

Every day I hear him or her complain. How much strength or energy goes into the waste basket harboring this behavoir. It’s just as bad as writing a blog about it.

He can waste a lot of time discussing it. He will do everything in his power to captivate you in his justification for dissatisfaction.  Oh, man, what an agenda.

She sits down at the table. Her coffee in hand. What begins is an eyeful of you. Preying Mantis eyeing her prey. Sure the hands are clasped for a reverent bout of respectful conversation but underneath it all is pure discord and the need to get you involved. For no reason other than to have an audience she will weave a tale of intrigue and err. After an hour of this you feel drained, unhappy and on her side. Reluctantly you are on her side. Whatever it means you are on her side. You want to leave, but your good nature wants to help. The honeypot is set. You are trapped.

He rambles. Maybe he is eyeing his watch. Maybe he is not. You want to check yours. All of this conversation is dragging you down.  This is the type of person you won’t call ever again.

He asks after you finally make you way to the door: “Can we do this again?” Time to be the person you need to be.

“No.”

Successful people it has often been said are a bit cold. The reason they are cold is because they know there are time thieves everywhere. Little people who would do nothing else but broadcast disaster, pain and suffering. Endless adoration for dissent. We are not talking about the recalcitrant out of step drummer. She is drumming contently. Or he is dancing to his own tune. No, this person is blatantly doing nothing but talking.

Complain for control. Its not the musings of a journalist. Not even the musing of bad journalist. Not even the musings of a propaganda wizard.  This person just steals time. The worst crime of all is that they steal their own time too.

If you find that you are talking like this person, or with this person, its time to consider your goals. Set a goal and make something happen. Hold that goal like a deep secret treasure. Share it only in small portions. As soon as the conversation becomes a “You can’t do that.” Leave.